december,
my love,
you are so dear to me.
i will sign my letter ‘much love,
your love’
because you love me
even more than i love you.
i am lost in a crowd
and find company in stray
strands of my hair.
there is nothing i want
more than myself;
i think of a time i was
shattered.
i recreate who i am everyday,
find old pieces of me i wish i had lost
and glue them to parts
of me
i have never met before.
i mend with seams of gold.
as i mend,
i learn to receive the love the
universe
has for me.
why did i ever miss it?
so much warmth,
especially in the cold of winter.
so much love,
so much love,
and i was never ready to
see it.
i think about
begging to be loved,
skin of my knees
wearing away
as i beg and beg.
i think about hands sweating
and how they won’t separate;
there was a time i prayed
for love and
prayed
i might be enough.
i was a broken bowl,
and the love of the world
slipped through my cracks.
my dear december,
your cold has sealed
my seams of gold.
my dearest,
you have taught me to
look into the eyes
of the love i could never receive.
december,
my love,
my love,
how can i explain to this you?
december,
my dearest,
my love,
i will treasure you for all time.
i am a bowl
with seams of gold
and i fill with love more everyday.
much love,
your love.
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